Where Do Our Loved Ones Go After They Pass On?

Where Do Our Loved Ones Go After They Pass On?

Amidst the numbness and heartbreak of losing someone precious there are overwhelming questions that nag at us. Even though we’re often are not ready to search out the answers in our earliest stages of loss, we want some confirmation. We need some absolute proof of their ongoing existence and hope that with the right answers we will find a morsel or two of peace, hope and relief as we crawl through the darkness of grief. No matter what we have already learnt, read, believed and for some, experienced, there are still questions.

What happens after death?

How did they get there?

Can they see us?

What is heaven like?

Are they still part of me?

Do they feel my sorrow?

Are they happy?

Will I be reunited with them one day?

Have they changed?

How is the soul (energy) of someone able to exist outside their physical body?

From my experience so much of what I had known about life after death became scrambled when Zoe passed, especially in the early months. At times I just couldn’t remember details that had previously brought me comfort; words from books, documentaries and even my own heaven experience had distanced themselves from me so much of the time.

I recall two overwhelming thoughts that troubled me the most, the first was, ‘is Zoe still my sister, has that relationship between us changed?’ and the other was, ‘what actually happened to her when her heart stopped, where did she go exactly?’ as well as the occasional panicking thought of ‘What if there is no heaven?’

More questions followed but in the earliest days I just wanted answers to those nagging thoughts.

Even when I began to think more clearly and recalled information, all I had once been satisfied to know was now lacking; It merely outlined the process beyond death but was not substantial enough. There were lots of dots but no lines connecting them. It took me about a year of quietly grieving before I felt strong enough to look for and find those answers.

Through this series of posts on heaven I will share the understandings I have come to.

The First Stage: What Happens After Death

We have all heard of the white light and tunnel that countless regressions and NDE survivors have explained but it seems that not everyone goes straight to that white light. In fact most will hover around their physical body and loved ones before moving towards the light and many don’t ever experience the light at all. It seems that there are a number of different factors that determine the after death experience, those factors appear to directly relates to what the soul had believed about the afterlife whilst on earth, the circumstances leading up to their passing and/or how evolved they are as souls.

It stands to reason that each experience will be reflective of each soul’s individual journey. We are all different, no two physical births are identical so why should our deaths, or rebirths into the world of spirit be? One thing I have read recurrently from many different sources is that those without faith, those that believed there was nothing after death would quite often experience nothingness, they would be suspended in a stillness, a colourless, scentless and soulless place.

One man, during a between life regression described a past life heaven experience after his death; He found that after death he existed in a grey, silence and stillness for a short time, it was only when he questioned where he was, then,  astounded that he was able to hear his own thoughts, was able ascertain that he still existed in some form, he immediately questioned how that could be and again heard his thoughts, no answers arrived but he was compelled to ask more questions. After being left a short while to contemplate this experience and in turn acknowledging his continuing existence he able to move on, he described how the greyness simply melted away and he found himself in the most beautiful, colourful expanse, then he became aware of a loved ones energy moving towards him. He asked in his thoughts why he had been in this place of nothingness and received the knowledge that he was experiencing what he had spent his lifetime believing.

Many people have said that on leaving their physical bodies they hovered over themselves, curiously studying the shell they had once resided in. They all express an emotional disconnection from their physical body and almost all expressed no desire to return, they described an expansiveness that was euphoric, a connection to all things.

Most looked back at their shell with shock; they had not perceived themselves in life as they now appeared, some expressing a disappointment in their physical appearance but few said they were saddened, surprised and shocked at how good they did look and how critical of themselves they had been whist alive.

The separation was a welcomed and a wonderfully liberating one, there was freedom that our physical body denies us, the few that wished to return to their lives was mostly to take care of children or prevent suffering of loved ones still on earth.

Almost all the accounts I have read or watched on NDE (near death experience) and passed life regression that witnessed their physical body being resuscitated wondered why there was such a frantic determination for them to be kept alive. They were very happy to be free and without any physical restraints.

Most NDE’s described how loved ones or spirit friends (guides or beings of light) appeared to greet them, telepathically telling them it was not their time and they should go back to complete their lives, whilst those that experienced their transition through Past Life Regression were greeted by their loved ones who had come to collect them and move them on.

Those that experienced their transition beyond that point had two distinct paths, many said the walls of the room or the surroundings they had died in seemed to just fall away revealing another dimension where they were greeted by loved ones and beings of light, then there are those that did see the bright, warm, welcoming, white light, they were sometimes propelled towards it the moment their physical heart stopped but most often the newly departed soul moved towards the light more gradually, first staying around to watch themselves and their loved ones in the physical, trying to bring comfort and awareness, eventually though, they were greeted by spirit loved ones and drawn to the light.

All that have described a heaven experience have described wholeness and connectivity, unconditional and overwhelming love, peace and joy and on their return to their physical lives have found purpose, joy, spirituality and no fear of death.

Tune in soon for more on how our loved ones reached ‘heaven’

but for now here are some interesting video clips on between life regression and NDE’s


Much Love

3 Responses »

  1. My grandfather died twice…..the first time, he was ‘dead’ for 30 minutes as declared by a doctor. He went to Heaven and found a line he was not allowed to cross where his loved ones were waiting. He actually got angry when they would not let him cross. Then a large voice told him, “You have to go back…you still have work to do.” During the four years he lived after that, he ministered to many people and wrote praise hymns. When they found him dead in the fishing boat, he had the most peaceful smile on his face….He finally got to go home again. His story has affected us all. We do not fear death.

    • Thank you for sharing that Karen and how wonderful that he used his remaining years to make change, that was why it wasn’t his time!
      So many that experience near death are forever changed.
      My grandfather also had a similar experience, he went in to hospital for a fairly straight forward op, he was in his late 60′s early 70′s,
      After he came round from the anaesthetic he confided in my grandmother that he had seen his father standing beside him, his father had died when my grandfather was a boy of 10 years old so it was an emotional experience for him, he described the clothes his father wore and the feelings of familiarity, love and warmth,
      but his father wouldn’t let him progress, he told him he had to go back, it wasn’t his time yet, then he disappeared.
      What no-one had told my grand father at that point was that he had flat lined during the op and the Dr’s had had to resuscitate him.
      He lived another 15 years or so and became a much mellower more peaceful man for the experience.

      Congratulations on your published work, your book sounds very interesting, I’ll have to take a look!


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